It's 3:45am. I'm at home, fixing my iTunes playlists (how exciting!) when my phone flashes that bright white light indicating a new message. I check it, already knowing what to expect. I see your name flashing. "R u out?" Yep, right on cue. I take a deep sigh and put my phone down. I contemplate replying but stop myself midway. No, you are not a booty call, I think to myself before going back to what I was originally doing. You both know where this will end if you reply so just stop it. You deserve better than this. Trying to convince yourself is a harder task when all you wanna do is give in.
I stop and think what I would have done if I was out tonight. What if my friend didn't text me too late and I was able to go out and have drinks with her? Would I have been too intoxicated by now to make any sound decisions? Would I have replied drunkenly a "Pick me uppppp" message? Would we be driving to your place right now, hands entwined and kissing whenever we'd reach a red light? Would we be going up your stairs and into your room where you'd push me to your bed and hurriedly take off each other's clothes? Would I be on my back and you on top and us moving up and down, up and down? Would you be touching, licking, kissing every part of my body? Would you be calling me "baby" by now? Would I be moaning and screaming and cursing? Would we be switching positions by now, from missionary to cowgirl to doggie? Would you be coming on my back and wiping it off after? Would we be cuddling and kissing some more and staring at each other and eventually falling asleep from exhaustion?
I'd like to think we'd be at least halfway done by now but we're not. You're there and I'm here. Maybe next time.
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